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Posted by / 04-Jul-2019 14:29

People who aren't in the BDSM world think that Doms and subs are broken people.

Subs supposedly have no backbone, have daddy issues. I have two full-time employees and am a bossy boss. We are just expressing darker sides of ourselves the way everyone else probably has some fetish they're afraid to share.

We know what we're doing isn't fair to our spouses, but fortunately for me, I'm able to be honest with my husband about Doug. Recently, I flew to Boston for a long weekend when Doug's wife was out of town.He'd joke about making me scream, and I'd say, confidently, "Bring it." Or he'd forward articles or videos of BDSM research he'd done. In a D/s (Dominant/submissive) relationship, you have to trust each other—emotionally, mentally, spiritually. We settled on opposite sofas, and I was a fidgety, nervous mess.While a Dominant, or "Dom," may have the "power," he can only go as far as his submissive, or "sub," will let him. What if I didn't like the pain as much as the idea of it? And just like that, our long-distance, extramarital D/s relationship began.Months went by after we'd broken up, but I couldn't get Doug out of my head. I was initially shocked, and yet it made perfect sense. I messaged him: "I didn't know you had this side of you.I began having fantasies about him like I'd never had about anyone. I'd heard about BDSM—bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism—but didn't know much about it. Wasn't it weird that I, a proud feminist, could enjoy something so degrading? Wink, wink." At first, we casually texted, catching up on each other's lives.

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In a D/s relationship, you need to trust another human being in ways that are rarely explored.

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